How to Keep Paranoia from Ruining Your Relationship
A relationship filled with paranoia and doubts significantly contribute to its eventual demise. The damage goes beyond the quality of the relationship as it also leaves a scarring experience, making it even harder to be in healthy relationships in the future. Self-sabotaging thoughts not only hurt any future that your relationship has, it also hurts your mental and emotional health that puts your self-worth to a plummeting doom. It brings you down and makes you believe that you’re the worst.
It is important to recognize the signs that you or your significant other is unreasonably being paranoid. It’s also crucial that the problem is addressed head-on. And, it is a terrible mistake to identify paranoia as part of love or being in love. It can’t even be justified by that. Remember, love in its purest form, without doubts and malice, only breeds peace and happiness. The other problems that arise in any relationship; well, that’s people and their own baggage.
Here are ways you can stop paranoia from damaging your relationship:
Stop the urge to call and text when they’re out with friends
Being incessant on your calls and messages just because your partner is having a good time with friends implies mistrust and even insecurity. Why would it make you feel bad that the love of your life is having fun with others every now and then? Instead of getting worried for no reason, try to divert your attention to something else. Take a deep breath, put your phone down, and concentrate on other activities that you could be enjoying, either by yourself or with friends.
Go out and have fun with your friends as well
Instead of just sitting at home waiting for your partner to come home like a complete loser, go out with your friends as well and have fun with them. Couples that follow their individual interests have more to talk about when they’re together. Besides, spending time venturing on your personal hobbies makes you less likely to have unreasonable doubts and worries about your partner when they’re away. So, it’s pretty much a great distraction that also ends up doing you good.
Strive for honesty to recover
In the case of infidelity and both of you still want to save the relationship, honesty is important. Don’t be hesitant to seek professional help, too, if you think that’ll be best for the relationship and its healing. Psychologists can help people in terms of changing the way you think and feel, especially your thoughts and feelings in your relationship. While opting to overcome an affair can be both painful and confusing, it can be gratifying if you find the right expert to help you and your partner start anew.
Redirect concern by writing it down
It may be healing and beneficial to write down things that bother you as means of re-channeling negativities. This is better than being paranoid as this can be eventually frustrating for yourself and your partner at the same time. While it’s normal to be anxious about infidelity, you can control how you feel about it through journaling as this helps you gain wider perspectives that can make you feel better about yourself and whatever situation you’re in.
Be less guarded and cautious
People who are paranoid are always on guard because they strongly think that others are always looking for the chance to degrade, hurt, or terrorize them. These beliefs, which generally don’t have basis, in addition to their habits of culpability and disbelief, might get in the way when it comes to their capacity to establish close and healthy romantic relationships.
Take a deep breath before making your reaction heard, seen, or felt
The key to dealing with paranoia is to learn means of coping that help a person not react based on their emotions but on logic or reason. Surely, this isn’t easy as it seems especially when emotions are running high. But, if you make it a goal to, you can gradually help yourself to be more calm and mindful even during emotional situations. Learn how to delay reactivity and respond from a reasonable frame of mind in order to avoid severe conflicts with your significant other.
Resist being consumed by posts on social media
Obviously, social media can feed on someone’s paranoia because it is how people discreetly keep an eye out for possible suspicious behavior or activity. It’s also remarkable how a vague post can instantly fuel one’s insecurity or doubts. All of sudden, there’s a story you’re fabricating in your mind and it’s negatively impacting how you feel about yourself, your partner, and the status of your relationship. Rather than stalking your partner’s social media and devising stories solely based on this one comment from this person you don’t know, ask them unswervingly about it.
It can help if you can concentrate on every moment and understand the things that are happening right there and then, physically and emotionally. This practice can help decrease self-sabotaging mindset and behavior. For instance, understand what triggers certain worries and anxieties. Being able to identify the triggers help you prepare for them the next time something like that happens. With this, you can reconsider acting out on impulse. Without being fully aware of what’s taking place at a certain moment, you’re not able to think about your reactions.
Open your heart and give trust
In order to trust your partner and avoid feelings of doubts, you need to be able to love yourself first. Focus on your self-love and self-worth. Only then can you fully trust other people around you. If you’re insecure, that will manifest in how you handle your relationship, which means constant doubts, mistrust, and jealousy. If you want to change that, focus on self-love. This doesn’t mean being selfish or self-centered, just the healthy kind of love you can give to yourself.